The other night I received a phone call around 5 til midnight. I checked the caller ID as I always do and did not recognize the number. So, I just let it ring. I waited for my phone to tell me I had a voicemail so I could hear who was calling me so late. This is what I heard:
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11:55pm
Keith: Hey baby, this Keith. Ah…uhh… Seems like you don’t got time for me right now….or, uh maybe, you know, you just went back to sleep. I hope I can try to be part of your life. I’m really (long pause) looking forward to it. I don’t know what the future holds but, I know what our future holds nothing. ( I have no idea what this means) I want you to be part of my life. I need something different. I need to do something different and I want to do it with you. Please give me a chance. (exasperated sigh) I want to love you real bad. I want you to love me too. I believe you will want for me. I’m praying that you are. Goodnight baby. *click
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Obviously, Keith had my number confused with someone else and did not bother to listen to the name on the greeting. I have no idea who this is. So, I sent a text to the number to tell him he had the wrong number. Problem solved.
Shortly after I listened to this message I went to bed. OK. Keith did not appear to get my text because I heard the phone ring again. Now, instead of being amused I was a bit miffed. How dare he interrupt my sleep. I saw that it was the same number and could not even muster the strength to pick up and tell him he had the wrong number. So, I ignored it and fell back asleep. About an hour later *ring, ring (Yes, my cell phone sounds like an old timey rotary phone). Its Keith again. Boy, this guy just doesn't give up! I ignored it again because I wasn't even conscious of my on hands let alone capable of answering a phone call at 2 in the morning.
The next morning, these are the voice mails I heard:
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12:56am
Baby (sounding confused and upset) this is ME calling you back. You’re not answering your phone. (incredulous) So, I’ll try again (sounding a bit dejected). If I don’t get you, I’ll just call you in the morning. I’ll try again in a few minutes. (But I thought you said you weren’t going to call again until the morning) Good bye baby. *click
2:03am
Baby, I’m trying to call you back. (desperation in his voice). You must have went to sleep. I told you I’d hold you in my arms, massage you with my tongue. (ewwww) Anyway…that time will come. So, I just want to say good night to you. I’ll be thinking about you (Yeah….I sure bet you will). Can’t wait to ho-…..can’t wait to see you again. This Keith. (as if we needed another reminder) Goodnight baby. *click
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I, of course, could not leave this alone. So, I let me co-worker listen to the messages. After a few minutes of laughter, I decided to call Keith and tell him not to call me anymore. I didn't want his words to fall on deaf ears but, I also didn't want him waking me up again in the middle of the night. I called the number and a woman answered. Uh oh!
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Me: "Hi. Yeah..ahh .....is Keith there?"
Woman: "No."
Me: "Well, can you give him a message for me? Can you just tell him to stop calling me. I think he has the wrong number."
"OK. I'll tell him."
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Uh oh! I hope that wasn't Keith's wife or, as also affectionately know in parts of Oakland as his "old lady". A few minutes go by and I return to my cubicle to actually start working. *ring, ring
This time its a blocked number. Out of shear curiosity I pick up.
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Caller: "Why did you tell my mom you didn't want me to call you no more?"
Me: "Is this Keith?" as if I had to ask. I would know that voice anywhere by now.
Keith:"You know who this is."
Me: "No. Actually I don't know you."
Keith: "Of course you do. Don't act like you don't know me."
Me:"I think you have the wrong number."
Keith: "C'mon baby. Don't treat me like that. You know me. We met at Whitney's. I thought we had a connection."
Me: "No. That wasn't me. I don't know you or anyone named Whitney. I told you. You have the wrong number. Just don't call me. Who do you think I am?"
Keith: "You're Christy. We met at Whitney's place."
Me: "Nope. That's not me. You have the wrong number. I don't want you waking me up anymore."
Keith: "Ok. I WON'T call you no more."
*click
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I don't think Keith believed me. He must think this Christy chick is blowin' him off...and she probably has good reason too. This guy sounds like a real piece of work.
I sort of half expected to get another phone call from Keith last night. Maybe I convinced him that I wasn't Christy and that he had the wrong number. Maybe he still thinks I am Christy and she/I want nothing to do with him. I really don't care. I'm just glad I got a full, uninterrupted night of sleep.
